Without a single clue as to what this morning would bring, I over-snoozed for 32 minutes before tossing contacts into my eyes and climbing into the shower.  While my hair over-conditioned I decided what to wear today.  By the time the Hubster stumbled in for his shower, I was mid-way through makeup with my hair air-drying.  He commented that he meant to wake up earlier, which prompted me to look at the clock.  Previously, I had fully intended to LEAVE THE HOUSE twelve minutes from the time the clock displayed at that moment.  I looked in the mirror.  No.  Freaking. Way.

So what do you think would be THE MOST NORMAL thing for a person to do upon realizing he/she is running about 10 minutes behind schedule on the kids’ last day of summer, with a forty-five minute drive ahead?  Why, clean the house and do laundry, OF COURSE!!!!!

Yeah, I know it was totally wrong for me to try to add tasks to an already delayed morning.  On any normal day, my reaction would have been to cease all preparing, yell for everyone to get in the car NOW, and frantically rummage for my keys as I sprint out of the kitchen, spilling coffee on the garage floor and cursing my snooze button.

Oh, but today was not going to be that day.  No, for reasons I could not previously explain, I have been doing things completely out of character…I’m cleaning things (the Hubster probably has not yet noticed, and will likely furrow his brow if he reads this, but yes, honey, it’s true…go look at the bathroom mirror and the shower tile).  I’m making my bed each day.  I’m making my bed.  Let me say again, I AM MAKING MY BED.  (This is something even my mother will tell you is simply not me.)  To make matters even more bizarre, I am LINT-ROLLING MABEL’S FUR off of my comforter.  EVERY. MORNING.  I must be sick.  Do I have fever?

This morning, half-dressed with wet hair, I decided to multi-task filling Mason and Mabel’s food bowls with doing a load of laundry.  SIMULTANEOUSLY.  The project was a success in that I only dropped about 15 pieces of kibble on the laundry room floor. One of the kibbles bounced under the dryer.  Bon Appétit, little dust-bunnies!

Next I made coffee (despite the fact that I knew it would be completely UN-enjoyable because of the burn on the roof of my mouth from last night’s pizza).  Can’t effectively “swoosh” a coffee pot in a sink full of dishes, so I decided to empty the sink.  And finding the dishwasher full of clean dishes, I began to remedy my obstacles one by one.

Eight minutes later, the coffee pot beeps as Dom is coming down the stairs to leave.  I decide he needs a cup…to-go!  (Awwww…yes, I can be sweet like that.  He likes to pretend it never happens.  Hmpff!)  I rifle through the cabinet for an appropriate travel mug, hoping to find one that will not result in coffee all down the front of that nice, white, dry-cleaned shirt he is wearing.  Cup handed, kisses swapped and he is out the door, totally distracted by my random act of kindness.  That’s when I realize I am STILL half-dressed with wet hair.  O. M. G., Lori!  Get it in gear!!

Finally “ready” fourteen minutes later I grabbed my purse and keys from the kitchen counter and noticed Dom’s phone sitting there.  Damn!  See??? He was so distracted by my coffee kindness that he forgot his phone.  Normally, I would call to let him know his phone is at home (as if he didn’t realize it already) and he would fetch it during lunch.  Today, I took it with me, then called him at his desk and offered to BRING THE PHONE TO HIM on my way to work, which was going to be a late arrival anyway, so what’s one more stop??

As I drove to deliver the phone, I thought of all the things that caused my tardiness.  Mostly, it was the cleaning and voluntarily taking care of other people’s business that drove (no pun intended) this hour-late ETA at my own office.  And even though I knew I was totally late and not accomplishing the tasks I am paid to accomplish in that hour, all I wanted to do was go back home and clean some more.

Me.  Wanting to clean.  Instead of doing anything else.  Somebody call a doctor.

And then it hit me.  I’m nesting!!!  Just like a pregnant woman with an insatiable need to sanitize her home before the baby arrives, I am preparing to birth a middle-schooler tomorrow.  And the fear of the unknown is making me manic.  So I focus on what I can control…my home.  (Which is presently out of control or there wouldn’t be so darn much to clean, no???)  I have shopping lists and to-do lists and make-this-list-next lists, most of which are focused on the first day of school.   The same first day that will come and go whether I am ready for it or not…whether any sink is clean or tub tile is scrubbed…whether laundry is folded or pencils are sharpened.  With no regard for my desires, it will happen tomorrow at 7:30 a.m., Central Standard Time.  I will drop Aaron into foreign middle school territory while Vic enjoys the familiar comfort of our elementary school for two more years.  I will need Kleenexes, for sure.  (Add that to my mom-preparedness list.)  I have to be sure I hold back the tears until after I have dropped Vic off, so as not to upset the delicate balance of her own first-day-jitters.  Oh dear.  So much to do to keep my mind off of tomorrow.  And so I distract myself by nesting.  I think I’ll go scrub their lunchboxes…again.