98 Dog-Years

I am grateful, if not a little teary-eyed, to note that today is Mason’s 14^th birthday.  Fourteen years for a Labrador retriever is, quite frankly, impressive.  I remember the life-expectancy poster at the animal hospital where my mom worked for so long stating that a Lab’s life span is usually 10-11 years.  Mason was 9 at the time, and the poster made me blink back tears, hard.

I did not think we would have the gift of 14 years with him. He is definitely the dog that keeps on giving.

Although he is shedding fur by the ton lately, has random difficulty breathing, requires medication twice a day and can barely stay two minutes outside before the humidity threatens to incapacitate him, he still gives enthusiastic hugs and slurpy kisses, he still smiles, and he still wags his tail wildly at the sound of our voices.

The Kiddos and the Monk, 2008

I had worried that Mason wouldn’t survive leaving our old house. I worried that he wouldn’t live to see the new house. I worried that he wouldn’t see his 14th birthday. I don’t know if he will see his 15th. Hell, I don’t know if he’ll see this Christmas. We know we are on borrowed time, and we are grateful for every furry minute of it.

Two Sleepy Puppies, September 2013

Despite that Mason’s favorite foods have always been pizza and French fries, I try to make sure that he eats properly, which I firmly believe has contributed to his life span and overall health. We diagnosed a grain allergy when he was five and had to change his food to some crazy-expensive grain-free brand. When I started evaluating ingredients in our food, I naturally evaluated ingredients in our dogs’ foods and made sure that we only bought treats and foods that met my ingredient standards. I caved recently and allowed Milk Bones back in the house, only to read the ingredients on the box last month and ban them all over again.

What’s a snack-starved pup to do? Well, if you’re my pup, you lay across my pathway in the kitchen and take a snooze while I spend the next hour whipping up some grain-free dog treats.

Monkey Underfoot, September 2013

In honor of Mason, the Best Damn Yella Dog EVER, here’s a treat recipe for the furball in your life.

Grain-Free Dog Biscuits (originally found on More Than Paleo)

1 sweet potato, peeled, cut into chunks and boiled until soft.

¼ c. coconut milk (I was out of coconut milk, so I used almond milk instead)

1 ½ T flaxseed mixed with 2T water to make a paste (I was out of this too, so I used chia seeds)

½ c peanut butter (I think I need to go to the store!)

1 egg

½ c coconut flour (you can use more to thicken if you need to)

Mash up the boiled sweet potato chunks and add remaining ingredients. Blend together and drop by small spoonfuls onto a baking sheet lined with parchment paper. I scooped out about a teaspoon at a time and patted it flat in my hand to make a smooth, flat biscuit. (You don’t want rough edges.) They won’t spread out at all, so you can put them as close together as you like on the sheet, without letting them touch.

Bake for 40 minutes. Allow to cool. If these had turned out very crunchy, I would have stored them in the cookie jar where the dogs know their treats live. But since these turned out to still be a little soft in the middle, I followed More Than Paleo’s advice and stored them in the fridge. Now the pups think they’re getting some of our food!

Happy Birthday, Monkasaurus! We love ya to the moon and back!

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The Cookie and the Dog

Today we celebrate Mabel’s fifth birthday.  I don’t know whether the miracle is that we’ve survived or that she has.

Over the last month our furry youngster has consumed – among other things – two sticks of butter, three innocent frogs, a Silence-of-the-Lambs-size moth-bug-thing (creepy little dude, he was), a bag of deer jerky and an eighth of a 12” cookie cake (which thankfully didn’t have enough chocolate in it to do her harm).  The final two items earned her a public shaming on Facebook and Instagram.  She didn’t even have the decency to look remorseful.

Mabel gives us plenty of reasons to smile, though.  Every morning she insists on pushing the top of her head into me as I give her kisses on each ear.  If she doesn’t feel she has received enough affection, she firmly nudges my elbow until I acquiesce and pet her for another ten minutes.  It is especially annoying when she nudges the elbow connected to the hand holding a full cup of coffee.  And speaking of coffee, she still likes to sneak drinks from my cup.  In her quieter moments, Mabel suns herself in the backyard or snoozes on the puppy bed we have in the living room.  Her “comfy” positions crack us up.

In honor of the Teeny-Weeny Mabellini, (although after eating cookie cake, she’s not so teeny-weeny anymore)  here is the recipe for the homemade cookie cake I found in August (and which I have subsequently made five times.  Kinda takes away my right to scoff at Mabel’s weight, doesn’t it?)

Triple-Awesome Cookie Cake

I found the original recipe online, but for the life of me cannot get back to it.  You would think I could have bookmarked it, but alas…  If I come across it again I’ll be sure to link back.  At any rate, the original recipe is sufficient for a one-inch thick 12” round cake.  I needed more cookie for Aaron’s birthday party, so I increased the batter by half.  It’s just as easily reduced by half, so I’m listing all the appropriate measurements and sizes for your convenience.   It’s important to note at the beginning that I have changed the amount of chocolate chips in the cake because I thought the original recipe called for too much.  (Too much chocolate? I must be ill.) I have made it with full-on chocolate chips some times and half the allotment at others.  If you want more chocolate, feel free to double the portion of chips listed.

	8-9” pan	12” pan	11×15″ pan
Butter, room temp	1 stick	2 sticks	3 sticks
Sugar	¼ c	½ c	¾ c.
Brown Sugar	1/3 c.	2/3 c.	1 c.
Eggs	1	2	3
Vanilla	½ t.	1 t.	1 ½ t.
Flour, all purpose	1c + 2T	2c + 4T	3c + 6T
Kosher Salt	½ t	1 t	1 ½ t
Cream of Tartar	½ t	1 t	1 ½ t
Baking Soda	½ t	1 t	1 ½ t
Chocolate Chips, semi sweet (I use Ghirardelli baking chips)	½ c	1 c	1 ½ c

1. Cream the butter with both sugars in a mixing bowl (medium speed) until fluffy.  Add the eggs and vanilla and mix well.
2. In a separate bowl, combine the flour, salt, cream of tartar and baking soda.
3. Gently blend the flour mixture into the egg and sugar mixture.  Once combined, fold in the chocolate chips.
4. Spread the batter into a lightly greased pan. (I used to swear by Baker’s Joy, until I nixed the preservatives BHA and BHT from my life.  Now I use Spectrum Naturals brand Canola Spray with Flour for a quick and easy dusting.)  The batter is very thick, so I have to push it to the sides of the pan and smooth it out the best I can.
5. Bake at 350 degrees for 25, 30 or 35 minutes (depending on the size), or until the top is golden and you’re drooling at the lighted oven window.

So, yeah, this picture is totally of Aaron’s sheet-cookie-cake in August, and certainly not intended for Mabel on any day.  I used my regular buttercream icing recipe for the white icing, and whipped powdered sugar into homemade chocolate syrup for the accent icing.  To. Die. For!

Happy 5^th Birthday, Mabel.  Leave the cookie cake alone next time, please.

Renegade Recipes

I’ve been considering moving my recipe site into this one for some time now.  The link in the menu bar will take you to the separate site, but I’m kinda sick of having three separate sites to maintain.  I remember when I had five domains, and was actually entertaining the idea of seven-plus.  I can only blame the recent packing, moving and unpacking for my new attitude of “less is more.”

That being said, this blog is about to absorb all my recipes.  So if you are an email subscriber, and you are suddenly flooded with emails of new posts from me (like 20 or so at a time) please know that I tried to prevent that!!  If things go the way I want them to, then you won’t really be aware of all the posts being imported.  And if you determine that you want recipes, the link will still be in the menu to sort the category.  After that, you’ll just see my random recipe posts as I create them, interspersed with life lessons and the crazy in my head.  🙂

A few things you should know about my recipe categories:

“COOK IT HOW LONG???” recipes are those that simmer for an hour or more.  In other words, don’t plan to work all day and then come home to start this recipe for dinner.

“Time Hogs” don’t necessarily cook long, but the preparation is long and involved.  Save these recipes for the weekend when you’re not already stressed.

“THAT DOESN’T SUCK!!!!” recipes are those which have established themselves as worthy meals in our home, strictly according to Dom.  He is quite complimentary, but he is also a smarty-pants sometimes, and when he knows I’m hoping for a whopping compliment, he’ll often pacify me with an astonished “That doesn’t suck!!!”  It’s his way of saying, “Way to go, honey.  You rival Julia Child, Emeril AND Rachael Ray,” while still keeping me dangling on the hook.  What can I say?  It works.

Well, I’m off to stir things up in the WordPress dashboard now.  Wish me luck.  Oh, and Buon Appetito!!

The Most Fantabulous Shrimp-n-Grits

Tags

cream sauce, grits, recipe, shrimp

(Adapted from AllRecipes.com)

1 cup water

1 pinch salt

6 tablespoons grits

2 tablespoons olive oil (or better, vegetable broth.  I use mushroom broth – yum!)

2 tablespoons diced onion

2 tablespoons diced green bell pepper

20 medium shrimp, peeled and deveined

1/4 cup white wine

1 cup heavy whipping cream

2 fistfuls of fresh spinach

salt and ground black pepper to taste

Bring water and a pinch of salt to a boil in a saucepan and slowly mix in the grits, stirring constantly. Reduce heat to low and simmer grits until tender and smooth, about 20 minutes.  Recite lines from My Cousin Vinny, i.e.: “No self-respectin’ Southerner uses instant grits!” (For Pete’s sake, don’t tell anybody if you DO use instant grits!) Stir often. Set aside and keep warm.

Heat broth (of your choosing) in a large skillet over medium-high heat.  (Here’s the Purpose Driven Mom coming out in me:  you don’t want to sauté with olive oil because it cannot withstand high heat and will release harmful free radicals as it cooks.  Okay, rant over…)  As you’re sautéing, add a few more drops of broth as needed if you feel it’s evaporating out too fast.

Stir in onion and green bell pepper and cook until onion is translucent, about 4 minutes. Lightly stir the shrimp with the vegetables and broth until pink; remove shrimp from pan and set aside.

Pour white wine into the skillet and stir, dissolving any browned bits of food in the bottom of the skillet; slowly add the cream and stir gently.  Reduce heat to low and simmer until thickened, about 10 minutes. Season with salt and black pepper, then add fresh spinach and stir until it’s just a little wilted.

Gently combine the sauce with the grits and ladle onto plates.  Top with shrimp and serve.  Become somebody’s favorite chef ever.

The first time I made this, I didn’t have enough grits on hand and was afraid the meal would be lame.  So I made sweet biscuits and served the shrimp and grits over them.  Oh.  My. Goodness.

(If I can ever figure out why my biscuit recipe is so wonky – and fix it – I’ll share it with you.  Until then, I don’t want you to bake them up and be like, “Um, Lori?…what’s with this freaky biscuit batter??!!”  But they taste incredible, so I promise to share someday…)

I also use the same sauce with pasta (like this delicious organic spinach and cheese ravioli that I found at Target.)  It’s a win!

What’s a Person Gotta Do for a Scoop of Ice Cream Around Here????

True story:  This week we were due for grocery shopping.  I usually hit four stores total on grocery day.  Before I was ready to go to the third store, Dom offered to round up our Kroger items (the need for beer and/or milk usually gets him somehow involved). He and Aaron headed to Kroger armed with the list of items I typically buy there.  Such dears.

Much later that evening, after dinner and cleaning the kitchen and everything else that has to be done in a day, Aaron marched into the kitchen with a brand-new tub of Blue Bell ice cream.  I eagle-eyed it as if aliens had just invaded my home.  Aaron proceeded to explain:  “Daddy said this would make you mad, but he bought it anyway.”

I was livid.  LI. VID.  Is all this consumerism and change of conscience really just a joke? I turned and walked away, overdue for a little time on the backyard swing (provided the mean neighbors aren’t cussing each other in their own backyard.  That really invades my “chill” plans in a totally unacceptable manner.)

When I finally approached Dom about the ice cream, he explained to me that nothing tastes as good as Blue Bell, and that’s that.  Was it really so wrong for him to seek a little happiness in a tub of Homemade Vanilla?  And what was it I didn’t like about Blue Bell anyway??

Without the ingredient list in front of me, I couldn’t tell him.  I mean, I’m a conscientious consumer but I don’t have a photographic memory.  As I explained to my soul-mate who was looking at me like I’d just cancelled Christmas, something about the ingredient list was a red flag for me.  And anyway, why the hell didn’t he know how to read labels, huuuhhhhhhhhhhhh???

It was a sore subject for three days.  This afternoon in a very demure and non-threatening manner, I brought the ice cream tub to Dom and asked if he wanted my explanations on why I don’t buy it anymore and really don’t want the kids eating it.  He looked skeptical, but was at least willing to hear me out.

“Milk, sugar, cream…all perfectly fine.  Not organic, but relatively natural products if you can overlook all the antibiotic residue most likely entering your system as a bonus. High fructose corn syrup, corn syrup…why do they need to put so much corn into the ice cream?  Did you ever wonder that?  Do you think corn belongs in ice cream?  Besides that, these corn products are 90% guaranteed to be genetically modified products of Monsanto (and thereby resistant to Roundup, which means no matter how filtered the end product, it still comes to the consumer with traces of pesticides.)  Natural and artificial vanilla flavor…what do they use to make an artificial flavor?  Chemicals.  ‘Artificial’ means it was created in a lab, and chances are it was created with petroleum.”

He blinked a few times and nodded that he understood.  I continued with the list of stabilizers and emulsifiers  – which I generally recognize as safe, but still I wonder why they need so many different ones – and ended with my explanation of the final ingredient, annatto color.  “Annatto is a naturally occurring substance typically used to give color to cheese.  The problem with annatto is that, even though it is natural, it is an allergen for many people.  Not the sniffly, sneezy type of allergen, but one that induces headaches and other random symptoms.   I truly believe annatto is the reason Aaron doesn’t like cheese.  Something about the mainstream cheeses turned him off.  Annatto was a common ingredient in all those things that he liked at one time, but doesn’t eat anymore.”

Please understand I am not on a campaign against Blue Bell.  I generally could never completely stomach their vanilla ice cream, but other flavors with all kinds of unnatural colors fit my formerly non-discriminating palate just fine.  (I was a complete fool for Mint Chocolate Chip in our salad days.) I just think that the only way to hold our food companies to a higher standard is to not buy the crap that they sell.  We have to actually demand better ingredients.  They’re not going to get the picture if the “crap” keeps getting votes at the checkout line.

I have a kick-butt vanilla ice cream recipe, and I plan to keep it fresh and on hand at both my home and my mother’s home for when the kids want to eat ice cream.  And hopefully, everyone in my house will someday come to appreciate the more wholesome varieties for what they don’t have.

THE BEST Vanilla Ice Cream

Are y’all ready for this?…

June’s issue of Southern Living magazine had a remarkable page dedicated to guilt-free but seriously delish ice cream.  I couldn’t wait to try it.  I have made the batter three times, and finished the ice cream twice.  Mechanical malfunctions (and my resulting hissy-fit) caused the first batch to go unmade.  But when I did finally borrow an ice-cream maker from Jill in order to make some birthday celebrations at work just a little bit sweeter, I was so incredibly glad that I had this recipe.  It. Is. Tha. Bomb. 

(Confession: I don’t typically go around calling things “tha bomb.”  It’s really not my style.  But the context totally fits here.  I just have to say that typing that phrase makes me think I will somehow end up on the FBI’s watchlist or something.  So, if that ever comes to fruition: Hi, Fellas.  Please enjoy some ice cream. 😉 )

Southern Living calls this “Lightened Vanilla Bean Ice Cream.”  I call it frozen heaven.

1/2 c.  granular sweetener for ice cream*
2 T cornstarch
1/8 t salt
2 c reduced-fat 2% milk
1 c half-and-half
1 egg yolk**
1 1/2 t vanilla bean paste or extract***

Whisk together first 3 ingredients in a large heavy saucepan.  Gradually whisk in milk and half-and-half.  Cook over medium heat, stirring constantly about 8-10 minutes or until slightly thickened.  Remove from heat.

Whisk egg yolk separately until slightly thickened.  Gradually whisk about 1 cup of the hot cream mixture into the yolk.  This will keep the egg from cooking too fast and creating large lumps.  Add the yolk mixture to remaining cream mixture, whisking constantly.  Whisk in vanilla.

Pour mixture through a fine mesh sieve into a bowl, discarding any solids.  Cool one hour, stirring occasionally.  Place plastic wrap directly on cream mixture and chill 8-24 hours.

Pour mixture into freezer container of 1 1/2 quart electric ice cream maker and freeze according to manufacturer’s instructions.  Let stand at room temperature 5-10 minutes before serving.****

Calories per 1/2 cup: 92; Fat 5g (Sat 3g); Protein 3g; Carb 18g; Fiber 0g; Cholesterol 42mg; Iron 0mg; Sodium 76mg; Calcium 106mg

*I totaly use my table sugar in this recipe, which happens to be Florida Crystals Organic Cane Sugar.  It works beautifully.

**Two ice-cream batches later I finally realized this said 1 egg yolk.  I had used the whole egg both times.  Sure, “oops!” but it turned out fine.

***Vanilla Bean Paste.  I had no clue what this was, but I found it in the gourmet section of Amazon.com.  I think this adds better flavor than extract would, but I could be wrong.  It does add that nice vanilla bean speckled look.

****I dunno.  I don’t think I would let it sit out for 10 minutes.  Just sayin’.

 

Spinach Watermelon Salad

I found this recipe in a calorie counter app and am dying to try it.  Yes, I am breaking my own rule of ONLY allowing tried-and-true confirmed-AWESOME recipes that I can personally vouch for on this site.  But, I love all the ingredients in this recipe – except the onion – so I think I’m safe.

4 oz feta cheese, crumbled

2 Tbsp mint

1/4 cup balsamic vinaigrette

8 cups watermelon

1  red Onion, medium

1  spinach, baby leaf

Toss all ingredients into a large bowl and serve.

Mediterranean Spinach Sautee

So three nights ago, Dom and I decided we would try our hand at Blackened Salmon (which turned out fine, even if we didn’t know what we were doing.)  I looked around for healthy ingredients to make a quick side dish, and this is what I came up with.

2 T organic chicken broth or vegetable broth
½ cup Organic Kalamata olives, sliced
½ cup Organic sun dried tomatoes in olive oil, chopped
4 cups fresh organic baby spinach

Heat the broth in saucepan and sautee olives with the tomatoes for about 4 minutes.  Add the spinach and sautee just until wilted and serve immediately.  Makes roughly 3 servings.

Day 295: Let’s Just Call This the “Food Issue”

Weekends typically involve three things around our house: Mass, laundry, and bread baking.  This weekend we added two more components:  full-meal cooking and gardening.

Yes, I am happy to report that we finally seeded the garden, but more on that later.  For now, let’s talk food!!!

I am head-over-heels in love with my new oven.  And not just because it cooks RELIABLY, but also because for the first time EVER I am cooking with GAS!  Ohhhhhhh, the difference!  Ohhhhhhh myyyyy gooodnesssssssss, the heavenly difference!!

I should be royally embarrassed to admit this, but you have travelled this road with me through goth hair dye and grey lip gloss, so you know I’ll share practically anything with you and feel no shame.  I had never been able to sauté anything correctly before.  Never.  Yeah, I know…But, hey, I practically had Abe Lincoln’s oven and cooktop, yaknowwhaddImean?

But I was able to sauté a trinity mix TO PERFECTION last week, and it felt divine!  I’m gonna paint my front door orange and change my name to Wolfgang Puck.  (movie, movie? Oh, nevermind.)  Wanna know what I cooked?  Sure ya do!

First, Dom was feeling majorly under the weather on Wednesday, so I made a Chicken, Mushroom, and Wild Rice Soup.  This was the recipe that called for the sautéed trinity.  I also simmered (yes!  I SIMMERED!) cream and broth for the base.  The recipe turned out extraordinary!  And Dom was well within 24 hours.  I give full credit to the soup.  You have to try it out!

By the way, two of the recipes I tried this weekend were from the March issue of Southern Living magazine.  I’ll share my mad mag skillz later this week.  😉

With the raging success of my soup, I was ready to venture into other fun recipes.  Fridays during Lent are usually reserved for Stations of the Cross and fish dinners at the church, but Dom and Aaron had a haircut appointment to keep, so we opted for eating in after they got coiffed.  I had no particular menu planned for Friday night, and with meat out of the question, I decided on Fancy Grilled Cheese sandwiches.  Now, I was originally intending to serve these on homemade bread, but the bread would not be baked until Saturday, so I cut into a French loaf from Kroger’s bakery and made mini-sandwiches.  It worked, but the sandwich didn’t have enough stability by the time I loaded it up with strawberries, goat cheese, and spinach, so I ended up squishing them into the Foreman and making paninis out of them.  And though Dom eyed the sandwiches with mild suspicion, he tasted and gave them the thumbs up.

Saturday morning I began the task of proofing the sandwich bread and planning breakfast.  Dom wanted Greek Omelets for breakfast, so he helped me cook them while I whipped up some Peach Walnut Muffins.  The muffin recipe makes a dozen, and I sent three to my Father-in-law Saturday night.  I had to make more muffins on Sunday night.  In 36 hours, Dom and I ate nine muffins!  My scales hate me. 

The omelets prompted me to go on a hunt for eco-friendly cookware.  That’s another post all by itself.  Geez, I needed one 8-inch pan, and I ended up with more health issues to consider.  Now I gotta find cookware with no PFCs, PFOAs, or PTFE.  Ugh!!!

We satisfied Victoria’s craving for crawfish at a local restaurant after Mass on Saturday, and then came home to continue the bread baking.  By the time I pulled the bread out of the oven at 11pm, I thought it was undercooked.  But then I realized that my former oven just burned the hell out of food and gave me too much crust on my breads, while this new baby baked the bread to a truly “golden” brown.  Even though I was completely exhausted, I was overjoyed at the sight of a perfect loaf of bread.  I even found my second wind and began to prepare the Overnight French Toast for Sunday’s breakfast, WHICH EVERYBODY ATE. That and pancakes are the only meals I have ever cooked that all four of us sat down and ate together, with no one wanting a PBJ instead of the menu entrée.    Yowza!

If you peruse the recipes linked in this post and you try them out, please comment and let me know if you change anything.  I’d love to hear how I can make these even better!!

Happy cooking!

Chicken, Mushroom, and Wild Rice Soup

This is THE BEST home-cooked chicken and rice soup.  I was amazed at how awesome it is! It makes a lot (14 cups) so plan to share.  😉  You will use a lot of pans in making this, but it is sooooo worth it. 

2 (6-oz) packages long grain and wild rice mix
10 cups chicken broth, divided
3 Tbsp butter
1 cup sliced fresh mushrooms (I use organic baby bella)
1 cup chopped fresh onion
1 cup chopped celery
¼ cup butter
½ cup all-purpose flour
½ cup half-and-half
2 T dry white wine
2 cups cooked shredded chicken breasts (I used one of the grocery store rotisserie chickens to save time in a pinch)

Bring rice, 4 cups chicken broth, and 1 seasoning packet from rice mix to a boil in a saucepan over medium-high heat.  Cover, reduce to low and simmer for 20 minutes or until liquid is absorbed and rice is tender. 

Meanwhile, melt 3 T butter in large skillet over meium heat; add mushrooms, onion and celery and cook, stirring often, 10-12 minutes or until tender.

Melt ¼ cup butter in dutch oven over medium heat; whisk in flour, stirring constantly, 1 minute or until thickened and bubbly.  Gradually whisk in remaining 6 cups broth and cook, stirring often, 8-10 minutes or until slightly thinckened.  Whisk in wine and half and half.  Stir in mushroom mixture, chicken and rice.  Cook, stirring occasionally, 5-10 minutes or until thoroughly heated.  (Do not boil.)